Sunday, July 8, 2012

2012, Volume 1: A Look at the First Half of the Cinematic Year

With half the year over (give or take a week), let us take a look at the 47 US theatrical releases seen by yours truly so far this year, in a relatively (but not written in stone) preferential-ish kinda order.
The Turin Horse - Who wants to watch a 146 min. b&w Hungarian film about the end of the world? 
The Kid With a Bike - The most light-hearted of the Dardenne's oeuvre is also their best.
Cabin in the Woods - Take one tired cliche-riddled genre and twist it around like a mother fucker. 
Haywire / Magic Mike - Soderbergh's (yet another) one two punch.
Damsels in Distress - A fluffy yet dense omelet.  Breakfast is served bitches.
Prometheus - The nay-sayers can go to whatever hell/purgatory/damnation they believe in. 
Little White Lies - Coming (finally!!) to US screens in a few weeks.
The Deep Blue Sea - Dark, moody and lustful.  Just how I like my Terence Davies.
The Avengers - They have a Hulk.
21 Jump Street - I still cannot believe I enjoyed this film as much as I did.
Jeff Who Lives at Home / Your Sister's Sister - A Post-Mumblecore one two punch.
Turn Me On, Dammit! - Sweet. Sexy. Tender. Quaint. Shy. Sexy. Norwegian.
Bernie - Fact meets fiction meets Jack Black.
Moonrise Kingdom - Wes Anderson being Wes Anderson.
Chico & Rita - Not since Heavy Metal has animation been this steamy.
Attenberg - How do you say strangely erotic in Greek?
John Carter - No, this is not a mistake.  I meant to put this one here.
Miss Bala - The most fucked-up beauty pageant movie ever.
Rock of Ages - It ain't Singin' in the Rain, but then Gene Kelly never had this kind of hair.
The Amazing Spider-Man - Unnecessary but not unwanted.
We Have A Pope - Italian dramedy at its drollest.
Brave - Who doesn't love a story about a redhead with a bow and arrow?
The Raid: Redemption - Ouch.  And I mean that in the most complimentary manner.
A Cat in Paris - Leave it to the French.  And I mean that in the most complimentary manner too.
A Burning Hot Summer - Leave it to the French.  And I mean that the way it sounds.
The Secret World of Arrietty - Little people got no reason, but they are kinda cute.
Chronicle - How do you say that?  Had its moments?  Could have been worse?  Meh?
The Woman in Black - Old fashioned horror movie that is perhaps too silly for its own good.
Mirror Mirror / Snow White & the Huntsman - Two banal peas in a banal pod.
Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance - It could have been a whole hell of a lot worse.
Ted - Remember when Seth MacFarlane was funny?  Yeah, he should try that again someday.
The Dictator - Remember when Sasha Baron Cohen was funny?  Yeah, me neither.
Seeking a Friend for the End of the World - Are we supposed to wish for the end of the world?
To Rome With Love - When even your actors look bored...
The Hunger Games - Please tell me the book didn't suck this much!
The Grey - If there had only been more wolf punching.
Battleship - It's as fun as the game itself.  Take that however you want.
Dark Shadows - Wait.  Tim Burton is still making movies?  Well that probably needs to stop.
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter - Great premise.  Godawful movie.
Wrath of the Titans - Did I really watch this?
4:44 Last Day on Earth - Abel Ferrara and still ranked below Wrath of the Titans.
Chernobyl Diaries - When you wish every character dead from scene one, does it even matter?
Man on a Ledge - I think I originally said this was a candidate for dumbest movie of the year.
The Raven - But then I saw this movie.


Dave Enkosky said...

If I'm getting this right--and I think I am--The Turin House and The Raven are equally great.

100 Years of Movies said...

Have not seen nearly enough of these. Totally agree on Prometheus. Based on the on-line reaction, I thought it was going to be 2+ hours of Ridley Scott kicking me in the shin or something. Fortunately, the director failed to show, but I got to watch Fassbender rule.